Tanks and Pranks by Chaka

Categories: Current Affairs

tank

The T-55 Tank classified as a ‘main battle tank’ is the most-produced tank in history with production numbers estimated at close to 100,000. It weighs 36 Tons (36,000 kg) and is 6.45m in length and 3.37m wide. The tank also has a nuclear, biological, and chemical (NBC) protection system which makes it a really mean beast that can take as much as it gives. There is no need to go into the specifics of what this tank can do but it is safe to reside in the knowledge that it is built and sufficiently armed to inflict maximum damage on unprecedented scales.

This is as it relates purely to war and so when it was reported in the dailies that the Nigerian troops had seized a T-55 tank from the Boko Haram insurgents, it again brought home the fact that the insurgents meant business and had prepared themselves for war. The first question I asked myself was, how did the tank/s get into the country ‘unnoticed’?

It brings to mind an incident I witnessed some years ago. We were in the office of the Port Manager of the largest sea port in a certain country, observing the Port Manager as he glared at his sub-ordinates.

‘You can’t find what?’ he asked.
‘The ship Sir.’
‘Since when?!!’
‘Since last night Sir.’
‘Are you telling me that a whole ship came into this port since last night and you can’t find it???!!!’
‘Yes Sir, we have looked everywhere for it and we can’t locate it Sir.’
‘Let me warn you, you better find it. You better find it!

‘Can you imagine!’ he said as he turned to us with an exasperated look on his face.

Our Canadian business partners stared open-mouthed at the Port Manager and then at us, and then back at the Port Manager in disbelief. We ourselves were in shock. As in, an entire ship; came into the port since last night, and then they couldn’t find it again… as at 2pm the next day abi what were we hearing?

Was it a bicycle that they were looking for or what? How big was the entire port that they were looking for an entire ship. Our Chairman, a retired military General gave us a wry look that implied that the whole ‘show’ was for our benefit. About 30 minutes later, an admin officer appeared and proudly announced ‘we have found it Sir.’

That night I went to bed feeling a little less safe that I normally would feel and I said truly, except the Lord keeps the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. May the Lord continue to help us in Jesus name, amen.

This piece was written by Chaka

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